by Michael Smith, MFT, Associate Psychotherapist, The Buehler Institute

For some people, pornography is viewed as a healthy addition to an individual’s or couple’s sexual menu – it can help them feel sexual and provide an important release when they’re alone, or can help educate and stimulate a couple as they explore and experience sexuality with each other. However, as with anything that excites our brain chemicals, use of porn can become excessive and problematic.

If you’re concerned about your use of pornography, perhaps it’s time to examine why you look at it, and what affect it is having on your life. There is much controversy in the psychological community about the use of the words “sex” and “addiction” together, but as an experienced sex therapist and addiction counselor, I have helped many clients whose use of pornography, talking in sex chat rooms, or even using prostitutes or other sexual activities, can looks very similar to other clients who have developed problems with alcohol and drugs.

Often men or women come into my office to discuss a specific sexual or relationship problem and our talk leads to a discussion of their habits related to pornography. For this reason I frequently start talking to clients regarding their feelings about their use of porn. Whether my clients have spent ten minutes or ten hours viewing porn in one session, masturbating one time or many, how do they feel about the experience? Was it enjoyable and satisfying, or do they feel badly about the activity?

Frequently, compulsive users of porn feel that they’ve spent more time than they had intended, saw and/or said things that they are not proud of, and ultimately do not feel that it was a healthy experience, worthy of their time and energy. Like the substance abuser, individual often feel deep remorse after their porn-viewing binges.

More to come in Part 2.

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