by Carla Naragon, MFT

I encourage all sexual abuse survivors to reclaim the physical pleasure our bodies were designed to enjoy. As human beings, we are born with the innate capacity to enjoy sex. Consider it a divine gift.

Let’s correct some common misconceptions about sexual assault.

1. Myth: Sexual assault is a crime of passion and lust.
Fact: Sexual assault is a crime of violence. Assailants seek to dominate, humiliate, and punish their victims.

2. Myth: Assailants are usually crazed psychopaths who do not know their victims.
Fact: As many as 80% of all assaults involve acquaintances. An assailant might be someone you know intimately. He may be a coworker, a friend, or a family member.

3. Myth: Persons who dress or act in a “sexy” way are asking to be sexually assaulted.
Fact: Many convicted sexual assailants are unable to remember what their victims looked like or were wearing. Nothing a person does or does not do causes a brutal crime like sexual assault.

We cannot undo history. We cannot dissect out the parts of us we do not like and only keep the pieces we like. What save us is our ability to find compassion for the parts of ourselves we like the least.