By now you’ve surely read about the 16 (possibly more) girls in Gloucester, MA who made a pact to become pregnant. This is so strange and so wrong on so many levels. Becoming pregnant to create comraderie isn’t unusual; growing up, I was friends with the sons and daughters of my mother’s friends, because they had been pregnant around the same time.

It’s the age and context that are so troubling. Jamie Lynn Spears just gave birth; how could she not have influenced the girls in their choices? Don’t we hear over and over again how influential the media is?

But do we really heed the message? I don’t recall hearing anyone talking about how Spears’ life would change. We saw how it changed her sister Britney–from rock idol to shattered young mother. Magazine articles make celebrity motherhood sound all too easy, and very unlike reality.

Working actresses have choices that the Gloucester girls most likely do not. They can take time off from work; they can hire help. Whether they marry or not seems to be of little consequence.

Statistics about teen pregnancy tell a very different story. Teen girls tend to have premature and underweight infants. They struggle to finish school or earn a living. Children raised by single mothers are more likely to end up in poverty.

All of these issues have become embroiled in conservative ideas about abstinence. Obviously, these girls didn’t hear that message, making them no different than the scores of other girls who become sexually active, on average around age 15.

It’s all pretty sad, isn’t it?

If you have a teenager, this is a great time to talk about your views on premarital sex and pregnancy. Truthfully, it’s a conversation that should have begun in childhood, but better late than never. And if you can’t bring yourself to do it, enlist the help of a physician, nurse, or even a sex therapist.

A recent article in MSNBC addresses the issue of intimacy for returning veterans. Being injured neurologically and physically can have major impact on adjusting back to civilian life, and one of the areas not spoken about is how those will regain the intimate emotional and physical functioning they had before being deployed. One couple who experienced this first hand has started to speak publicly about this issue since it’s an important topic that veterans may be embarrassed to talk about or their doctors feel bringing it up would cross the line, but whatever the case it’s there and not only effects sex, but also, relationships in general. Due to having to adjust to their changes, the injured encounter new insecurities that may hinder their previous and future relationships, but with the right information and tools this can be helped.

According to DailyMail, pelvic floor exercises are a drug-free alternative that involves contracting of the pelvic muscles and brings the same results as Viagra, but without the side effects. This muscle, known as the pelvic floor, goes from the tailbone all the way to the pelvic bone having an important role when it comes to, not only having sex, but also controlling other daily functions that use that area of the body. According to one urologist, those who can have an erection, but are unable to keep it will be successful at this exercise, which we teach at The Buehler Institute. Check out the article to read about one mans successful experience with this.

Much has changed in the sperm and egg donation industry. According to Newsweek, it is no longer a private matter that a parent hides from a child. Curiosity has led not only the children, but also the donors to search and meet their offspring. To make the search easier top sperm banks are creating a registry system that could help or hinder the industry depending on the donors’ preference of anonymity. Those for this idea agree for reasons such as heredity factors like the sudden knowledge of diseases that run in the family. But some speculators that are against this are looking at rights of the adults, how much information should be put on any sort of tracking system, and the cost of all this.

This is a tough topic, but it’s been on my mind for weeks so I’ve decided to go ahead and tackle it.

It’s the subject of weight. Specifically, overweight. Now, anyone who knows me knows that I am, well, plump. There. Now you know. That being said, I have some endocrine problems chasing my number up the scale.

Last month I started using a medication that is supposed to bring that number down. Twice a day I have been injecting myself with Byetta so that I can be at a healthier weight. It’s pretty radical and I wouldn’t do it unless my metabolism wasn’t so slow. So believe me, I understand weight and have empathy for those who have that struggle.

It is heartbreaking to me when a married or partnered client comes, usually alone, to tell me that the real, secret reason they are no longer sexually attracted to their partner is because of weight gain. Usually, it isn’t just a matter of 10 or 20 lbs; most people seem to understand that as we age, weight may go up a bit.

No, what they complain about is a gain of 50 lbs. or more. They will show me the “pot” that their partner now has, modeling with their hands. And they all say the same thing: I love my partner, but they just got too darn fat. Read the rest of this entry …

Reuters Health released that the FDA has approved the first hormone spray-on. After one spray application, the hormonal formula is absorbed into the skin and dries in sixty seconds. Depending on how severe the menopause symptoms, spray frequency ranges from one to three. Convenient application and successful results may make this new product a treatment of choice for post-menopausal women.

Of course, one of the reasons a company might be in a rush to have a new form of delivering hormones might be to get women thinking that there is something new in the world of hormone replacement therapy (HRT).

Many women have become confused about hormones since the Women’s Health Initiative study was stopped when one group of women being studied were shown to have health problems attributed to HRT. But, the women in the study were post menopause.

What’s a woman to do? Well, the current recommendation seems to be (and I say “seems” because this is up to debate) to use HRT to manage menopausal symptoms in the lowest possible dose for the shortest amount of time.

More physicians seem to be prescribing topical estrogen to ease the vaginal dryness that comes with menopause, as well as other problems.

Of course, you should always talk with your physician about your own particular body and its needs.

One of the things that changes with menopause is sexuality. And if that’s something that interests you, then by all means come in for a discussion.

Also, I have used hypnosis with some good success for helping women to manage symptoms such as hot flashes and insomnia.

Bottom line: Use thoughtful judgment when it comes to taking any medication.

It is once again the time of year students wait for their acceptance letters from colleges. The question some incoming college students ask themselves is if they should reveal anything from completing drug rehabilitation to being diagnosed with a mental disorder. Although this information is confidential more and more colleges are accepting applications based on more than just SAT scores and overall academic performance. According to US News, college admission departments select based on an individuals performance as a member of society since college life would not only represent a smaller version of the real-world, but because in the past few years there has been a boom in the scrutiny of overlooked student files of those that have caused massive use of on-campus security. Professionals say that the decision of if and when to reveal past psychological history is a collaborative effort that involves those in close relationship to the incoming student since that could make or brake a students acceptance.

I’m so excited! Next spring I will be speaking at “Reclaiming Healthy Intimacy, Passion, and Pleasure” in New York at a function sponsored by The Women’s Sexual Health Foundation and Columbia University. I edit the foundation’s newsletter, which is run by Lisa Martinez, a nurse and attorney. Lisa is one of the most energetic people I know when it comes to promoting sexual health. Visit the foundation’s website and read some of the past newsletters.

Want to learn more? Then check out this story in Best Life Magazine, where I am quoted along with my colleague, Dr. Michael Krychman, on low libido.

Last week I received a mailing from a company that manufactures a supplement that they claimed helped women with their sex drive and men with their erectile function. Their research? None! In fact, nearly every member of one organization to which I belonged received the same mailing. We all get upset when we find out that someone is selling a product that has no research to back it up. In fact, two people from the organization contacted the company to discover that not even the CEO could say why their product worked.

Buyer beware. Pills from China, herbs from India, etc. are probably not going to fix what ails you. See a physician, see a sex therapist, but please get real help.